Redneck blues part 2

Have you seen those Keystone Light ads about some character named Keith Stone? That’s pretty much what this dude looked like, with the obvious addition of acne. Keith Stone, I should point out, is much too smooth for pimples…

There were surprising similarities between our conditions. He explained that he had never really had outrageous acne until after high school, which seemed like some kind of cruel joke to him since he wasn’t really all that interested in dating back then and these days it was pretty much all that he could think about. (He didn’t say “dating.”) He also suspected that his acne was somehow connected to stress. He pointed out that his pimples had gotten much worse since he had lost his job. Again, this seemed incredibly unfair to him. Prior to unemployment, he had worked in an auto shop. He came home most evenings covered in grease, but at least he had enough cash so that he didn’t have to worry about much.

Now that he had all of these financial pressures, though, his skin had erupted.

I told him that I had once worked in a pizza restaurant and that my job had inspired all of the jokes that one might imagine. He laughed, but I didn’t ask him if anyone had ever called him the redfaced redneck. The conversation was going well, and I didn’t really want to ruin it with a stupid joke that had gotten stuck in my head.

We shared our stories for over an hour, sucking down several of those cheap domestics, which started to taste better and better.


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